Today was my 47th birthday . I don't know if its the Irish and German in me , but my confession for today is , I was in a bit of a mood . I was really restless for some reason.
As I normally do , I spend some part of the day in reflection. Thinking back to past birthdays and just taking stock of ones life . My heart is always a bit heavy because on ones birthday , one usually thinks of their Mom. For a son growing up , a Mom plays a huge part in ones life . My Mom died from cancer 18 years ago this past September 6th . Each birthday that I draw closer to the age she died (52) just leaves me a bit saddened. I realize that at 47 , 52 is still way too young. I miss her more intensely on my birthday than any other day of the year . She is the woman who held me when I was sick , taught me to play my first guitar chords , helped me learn to drive(a standard no less), loved me with a sacrificial and forgiving love that every son should experience. Plus she kicked my butt as well when I messed up.
I still recall just before she died , she told me that she was really happy for me that I had a good wife who would love me and take care of me . Plus her first grandson ,Jacob (who was only 2 at the time) , was a sweet boy and she loved him so much . She told me to take care of him and have more children because she knew I would make a great Dad.Which God blessed us with Jordan , one year later . So for me , my birthday is always spent a little in the past .
Then I switch to taking stock. Where I'm at and where I want to be . Going forward , Lord willing , I want to be a better husband,Dad, friend . I want to serve the Lord more ,love Him more .Serve my church and see what God will do .
So I'm 47 . Only 3 years away from 50. Truly I'm a pilgrim on a path . I just pray from this point on , God will use me for His purpose and glory .
1 comment:
After knowing you for 26 years, I'm used to the weird DNA reactions. Most of the time, it's usually for a good reason. But, thanks for filling me in anyway.
Not the same way as you and your family do, but I miss her, too. I know she'd be proud of our 2 goofy boys and who they've become. For the record, even though I get blamed for some of Jordan's quirkier little habits, he's the spitting image of her. Plus, his weird sense of humour, is not all from me.
Finally, I don't think it's physically possible for you to become a better husband and father. Love you, and proud to be, Mrs Reg
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