To Pray or Not to Pray , I Have a Problem

Paul tells us , "pray without ceasing,(1 Thessalonians 5:17 ESV) . Jesus instructs the disciples in Matthew 6: 9-13 , commonly known as the Lord's prayer . Jesus also declared ,  If you ask me anything in my name, I will do it (John 14:14 ESV)  One could go to the Old Testament and read many prayers , so many through out the whole Bible it would take  a long time to list the commands to pray and the prayers of God's people . It has been said the the whole of the Psalms is a prayer book. So God's people are to be a people of prayer . It really is not an option . In real simple terms prayer is communication to God . We are to declare God's holiness, His glory and want to see His kingdom break into this world with the gospel of Jesus . We are also told to ask for forgiveness, to forgive others , for daily food , to not be lead into temptation . There are also prayers to made for the sick (James 5:14) 

But I have a confession to make . I have and do really struggle with personal prayer . I can pray for the gospel to to be preached , ask for forgiveness of sins , for God's kingdom to come but for situations like healing , those who are in need , and numerous other real personal situations I have truly struggled. Perhaps I doubt that God will answer these prayers or maybe I have yet to come to grips with a solid answer to satisfy my question that have come up over time. 

In the on going debate with atheist , for me the question that would get the most traction is how many prayers seem to go to deaf ears. I'm just being completely honest here . I have heard Christopher Hitchens challenge someone in a debate about the mother in Africa who is praying for her dying child to be healed or to just have enough food to eat or the parents of a dying child with cancer , crying out and what happens , nothing.  The answers given go like this . Well we don't know why , but God in His wisdom knows more than we . I have also heard this one , perhaps its not no but wait or this classic , we perhaps don't have enough faith or as James says , the prayer of the righteous man has great power and guess what , you just weren't righteous enough . We need to wrestle with these questions and I still hold answers that are biblical can be given. 

In many cases the answers given puts the emphasis on the person praying . The prayer is not effective because of sin in ones life , remember you have to be righteous ( who is that apart from the imputed righteousness of Christ) . Now it is true we can grieve and hinder our prayers with sin , but that still is a very poor answer. 

I'm going to be very blunt . I have prayed for healing for those who have been sick , including my Mom ( perhaps this is where my struggle began ) , and no physical healing happened . She is not the only case. I have prayed for opportunities in work , in education and no doors have opened . I could go on . Now some will say , it was not in God's will and how we can only see just to the horizon , but God can see the bigger picture . Yes He can and that's is why I struggle . If God is going to do what He will , and doesn't  change His decree's , then  He knows my desires before I even utter them . He knew I truly wanted my Mom healed , and the others I prayed for . He knows I need work that my body can do . He knows I want my son's to be saved and persevere in the faith . He knew I wanted my wife healed from cancer . 

Some will tell me well your wife was healed , and yes she has been healthy and cancer free for over 4 years (I'm very thankful)  but there was no supernatural healing ( perhaps there was and I cannot see it)' the doctors and science performed the healing. True I believe under God's providence but my point is , no instant healing. I'm not trying to be a doubter here and maybe I'm , or I'm so convinced of His sovereignty that I struggle and have a very fatalistic view of prayer. In other words , I can petition the Lord but He will do what He wills . 

It has been a  ongoing struggle for me for years . One that is truly difficult . I long and hunger for intimate communion with the Lord . I desire to see my prayer life awaken  and fear that my attitude is a clear barrier in seeing that take root. So as ironic as this is to say , pray for me . Pray that God would take away my cold doubting  heart , and awaken my heart to commune with my Lord .  

What I have decided to do is go to a group known for their passionate , Godly prayers , the Puritans , and read their prayers . Really I have no excuse , those old preachers and writers that I love ,  where men of prayer and ultimately Jesus prayed . That should settle it . Nuff said.